Among all of Wayne's many, many annoying tropes, the oddest one is his completely massive (and completely obvious) man-crush on Reds third baseman Scott Rolen. It doesn't matter if Rolen is playing in the game that Wayne's announcing, or even if he's in the same time zone. Some random player hits a home run and Wayne will say, "You know who really knows how to do a home run trot the right way? Scott Rolen." Someone is forced out at second and Wayne will say, "You know who really knows how to break up that double play? Scott Rolen." Someone picks his nose and Wayne will say, "You know who would never disrespect the game like that? Scott Rolen." It gets to the point where you wish Wayne would just make out with the guy at second base and be done with it.
The Mets are in Cincy tonight, but Rolen is on the DL, so I figured we might get a break from all the Rolen love. Shows what I know. During the top of the 3rd, Howie Rose mentioned that Rolen was injured, which sent Wayne off on this stemwinder about how Rolen has had so many shoulder problems that he (meaning Rolen, but probably Wayne too) is worried that it might mean the end of his career. The key quote was a certifiable Wayne's Whopper™: "He's had those shoulder problems forever, in his heart and soul."
No, you moron, he's had them IN HIS SHOULDER.
And to think I was doing such a good job of staying away from this blog this season. Fire Wayne Hagin already!